Thoughts and Adventures of a Theatre Kid

I had a rather odd experience and realization about two hours ago.  It was quiet- eerily quiet, more so than it should have been.  I think it took me a solid five minutes to figure out why it was so silent all of a sudden.  It hit me that it was because my mind was actually at peace and not buzzing with about a million thoughts all at once, like usual.  After another few minutes it dawned on me that it was also because I let myself actually feel what I was feeling and let out loud thoughts that had been haunting me for the last while.  I haven't been able to think this clearly in a long while. I'm going to be very honest with you all about my thoughts and feelings, which isn't an easy thing for me to do.  Earlier today I went for a walk because I'd been alone for a little too long and came to a difficult realization:  I think I have midl depression again.  This led me to actually be angry with myself because I'd never wanted to see depression rear it's ugly fa

My face hurts from smiling so much today.  I almost feel as if I got married or something because of all the "congratulations!" I've received.  I've felt so loved today too.  Here's why- I was baptized today!!  And it was amazing, if not a little nerve-wracking.  Back when I was applying for jobs this past August, and when I was in the interviewing process, I prayed about if Denver was where I should go- but I also prayed about the possibility of baptism.  And now here we are. Going into today I was super excited for my baptism- I'd been anticipating and looking forward to it all week!  It's all I've been able to think about for the last while, and I'll likely keep thinking about this day in the days to come too.  When I arrived at church this morning I felt very nervous and more than a little anxious, despite all my enthusiasm and excitedness.  I had a somewhat hard time focusing and listening to the sermon this morning because of that.  Almost

I don't think I'm alone when I say it's been one heck of a week.  There have been so many emotions flying around, I haven't known what to do with all of them.  It leads to a crammed head full of thoughts and feelings all jostling and vying for attention.  However, this post won't be political because I feel we've all had enough to last us a lifetime just in this past week alone.  Perhaps a different time when things have cooled down a bit. Instead I want to bring up the topic of hospitality, for one.  This morning the sermon was done by the author of the book "Unclobber" (check it out!) and it was on the story of Sodom and Gomorrah.  No, it wasn't about what you think- I gave a clue in the first sentence of this paragraph what it was actually about.  The story goes that two men came to Sodom and Gomorrah seeking a place to stay for the night.  Each house they came to turned them away until a man named Lot found them wandering around in the town s

This last week I found myself remembering and reflecting on the past few months.  It's almost mind-blowing how much can happen in such a short amount of time.  Hard to put into words too, for some of it. I don't quite remember how I thought to look again but this evening I again found/rediscovered a work book of sorts called "7 Stories". (Stories about one's life orientation(s).) Looking through it I found myself reminiscing a bit about a retreat I had the opportunity to go on this summer.  It was interesting to look through that book again through a slightly different but similar lens as when I first had the opportunity to go through it with my fellow DUS (Denver Urban Semester) people.  Mostly it was just intriguing to revisit, though I wish I remembered more what was said for my Illumination story. That thought came about from this past Wednesday from a discussion group I'm part of, when the "shadow self" came up.  Which led me to a thought pr